I'm Backkk

Hello all!  I cannot tell you how many times I've sat down to write this blog just to get back up again in frustration.  Sometimes I feel like I have so much to say, while other times I feel as if I have nothing at all to say.  I went through the last couple months of my journal to see what I've been up to lately only to find a lot of nothing and a couple of ridiculously hilarious stories that are not blog appropriate.  Womp Womp.

So I’ll start with my trip to the States…AMAZING…except for that one night I totaled my mom’s truck.  Sorry mom L.  But it was so so so good to see everyone!  I was a little nervous to come home because I know I’ve changed…I see things differently, and I think about things differently, and I was scared that was going to affect me in my relationships; However, I was able to fall back into place with all my friends and family as if I had never left.  Thank you to everyone for being AWESOME!  I didn’t do anything super exciting.  A lot of hanging out at the house, happy hours, a few stops in at the gym, a couple of Taco Tuesdays, but I just enjoyed being home, speaking English, and spending time with the wonderful people in my life.

After our ENTIRE flight was waved freely through customs, I emerged through the doors of the airport to find my host mom and sister from training welcoming me home.  I was very surprised and happy to see them there waiting for me!  They accompanied me to the bus terminal, made sure I was able to get a bus back to town, and we exchanged gifts before they went on their way.  My bus left the capital at about 10:00pm meaning I didn’t arrive in my pueblo until about 3:00am.  While waiting for my friend to come pick me up, a few Paraguayan men decided to strike up some small talk with me… “So are you pregnant?”  Excuse me, what?  “Are you pregnant, or are you just fat?”  Oh Paraguay how I’ve missed you and all your inappropriate comments.  No I’m not pregnant, I’ve just been traveling for close to 48 hours, I’m ridiculously bloated and I haven’t pooped for days…do you have any other questions?  Thank goodness Luis pulled up right at that moment.

One of my friends, Danielle, came to my site last week.  We went to this super sweet natural swimming pool in a nearby community on Sunday.  We swam for a bit, and then shared a few beers and some food with her fiancé and one of my friends from site.  It was a very relaxing Sunday before a week of summer camp with the kiddos!  Summer camp went really well.  There weren’t too many kids that came, but the ones who did enjoyed themselves.  Monday’s theme was trash and recycling so we played a bunch of games, sang some songs and did a few charlas covering these topics.  Tuesday we talked Nutrition, Wednesday we did arts and crafts all day, and Thursday we played games/sports and did an hour of “carnaval” basically just water balloons and slip ‘n slide.

-The super sweet natural swimming pool-





-The cows came to summer camp too-

-Me and the kids on Arts and Crafts day with their masks-

Last week I also started an exercise class.  We’ve been meeting three times a week.  I only have about 5-10 women coming each time.  I’ve heard all kinds of excuses of why the women aren’t showing up.  My favorite so far?  “Casey, I haven’t been coming to your exercise class because I don’t have “lindo” (pretty) tennis shoes.”  I just looked at her and laughed in her face.  I can’t make this stuff up.  Paraguayans are obsessed with Lindo.  Everything has to be lindo so this is an actual concern of theirs that I will just never understand.  However, the most common excuse is that the women want to come, but they are too shy.  Hopefully they will get over their timid-ness and get their booties to the field sometime soon.  I’ve been doing crossfit style workouts…short, but high intensity.  The women keep telling me they’ve never sweat so much in their life, and that their bodies hurt and I just say GOOD…and you’re going to hurt more tomorrow!

I’m still working with my bathroom commission, but we’ve hit a bump in the road.  The governor, who promised us 100 million guaranies (basically the total cost of the project), is apparently being accused of embezzling some ridiculous amount of money (I heard 122 thousand million guaranies…I can’t even fathom that number in my head) and the government is currently undergoing an audit thus freezing ALL funds for three months.  I have no idea what’s going on, if this is true, or what’s going to happen. We’re planning on going to talk to the government sometime next week in order to try to get some answers.  Jahechata.  But…we are currently organizing a horse race for next weekend and a fiesta for Valentine’s Day in order to raise some of our own funds.

And other than that I haven’t been up to too much… We're currently in the middle of summer...which means it’s hot as balls out and not much is going on.  I spend most of my day sweating, swinging in my hammock, writing in my journal, watching movies or TV shows from my hard-drive, sweeping, killing bugs, listening and singing along to my favorite music (I made myself hoarse the other day), and drinking LOTS of terere with my neighbors.

The next training group…our sister G (G-38) will be here in about 2 weeks so that’s super exciting!  If any of you have happened to stumble across my blog feel free to send me any and all questions/concerns you have and I will be happy to do my best to answer your questions.  And, word of advice?  Do not listen to the packing list that Peace Corps sends you.  Bring the things that you use/wear now on a regular basis…that’s what you’ll be wanting and wearing.

The Best and Worst of Peace Corps Paraguay

Hello all!  I'm sorry I have been completely MIA for a while now.  I got caught up in who knows what here in Paraguay and then I went home to the U.S. for a few weeks to spend Christmas and New Years...and now I'm back again.  I am WAY overdue for a real blog update, and I have lots of things to fill everyone in on!  I've been having a rough couple of first days back so I'm going to wait until I'm back on my feet before I write a real update.  Gotta get all the negative out in my journal before I can fill you all in on the positives.  But, I wanted to let you all know, I'm alive and well and chugging away down here...and here's a little Questionnaire I filled out to keep you all entertained in the meantime...Enjoy :)

Moment that made me rethink dairy: Chunky milk.  Stinky cheese. Nuff said.

What reminded me most that I’m in Paraguay: The beautiful red dirt roads, and the fact that I only know what is happening/being said about 5% of the time.

Most surprisingly tasty food: Milanesa de cocodrillo mmmmm mmmm so tasty.  Fried crocodile.

Favorite thing to find being recycled by other volunteers who have recently returned from The States or had a friend come visit: Well I’m bringing some pretty sweet stuff from the states for myself.

Most entertaining adventure: There are so many!  There’s the time when I was going for a stroll and catching up with Stacy when the chiv cramps overtook me and I had to relieve my bowels on the side of the road.  There were the Eco Reserve-hanging bridges, zip lining, and propelling adventure.  There was the time I took the wrong bus and ended up in some weird neighborhood outside of the capital.  It took me approximately 4 hours to get home instead of 1.  There was the time I got woken up at 5am with a message to go watch a cow slaughter.  And there are MANY more that are not blog appropriate J

Moment that made me realize no bug experience could ever get much worse: The day I woke up with 163 bug bites on my legs during training.  The worst part was the walk home…it was so hot and I was sweating so much I was stomping during our walk home in an attempt to relieve the itch without scratching…and I may or may not have started crying. Haha.  Or perhaps when I tried to engage war against the ants, moved everything in my entire house was spraying them to death, powdering them to death and running outside gagging and gasping for breath only for there to still be ants and their eggs falling on my bed.

Favorite thing to do on vacation: Sit in climate controlled areas.  Workout at a gym.  Understand what is going on around me.  Appreciate time with my family and friends.

Moment that made me stop and say, “Where am I?”: During my first week in site where I attended my first horse race…about a 5 minute walk from my house.  So awesome.

Most shocking information I have given to a Paraguayan:  The fact that I think black people are beautiful.   They didn’t understand.  And I don’t understand how you cannot think they are beautiful.

Most entertaining question asked by a Paraguayan: Hmmm…I’m so immune to the strange questions now that I can’t think of a good one!  The geography questions are pretty good… “The United States is right next to Japan, right?” And, one time I was talking to a nursing student about the healthiness of vegetables to which he responded “Who says?”

Something I would never have done if I were not living here: Pooped in a bucket in my living room.  The cement in my bathroom was drying and I didn’t have access to a latrine.  What would you have done?

Favorite new culinary technique: Homemade pizza.

Funniest Guarani word learned: We’ve been over this before…because of its translation Ejapiro…peel your penis.

Most uncomfortable charla moment: Before I gave my breastfeeding charlas...whenever someone asked me what the topic was I would automatically grab my boobs and say breastfeeding!

Favorite American topic that Paraguayans like to talk to me about: How rich we ALL are.  Righttt.

Longest running joke in my host-family: “Casey Crazy”  my nickname.  Or, the fact that I like large mandioca (penises)…hooray for language mishaps during lunchtime.

Moment that almost gave me a heart attack: When I got charged by a bull during my future site visit.  I literally thought I was going to die at that day.

Strangest thing I have seen being sold on a city bus: Oh you can buy anything on the buses.  You need oil, apples, oranges, pineapples, DVD's, weight loss supplements, chains, watches, wallets, belts...you name it and your neighborhood bus will most likely pick up a vendor selling it.

Hottest day: I try not to look at the temperature because I don’t even want to know.

Thing that makes me feel like a lot tougher than I am: Dealing with all of the “creatures” that live with me.

Favorite book read in site: “Shantaram.” Gregory David Roberts

Most unusual injury sustained when considering I am a Peace Corps volunteer: Thankfully, I haven’t had any major injuries…but I did have infected/inflamed hair follicles on my scalp at one point.  How does that happen?

Funniest cultural thing in general: How indirect the people are about most things…but yet ridiculously, rudely (interpreted by someone from the U.S.) direct about other things.  Strange.

El Tiempo Vuela

Hello to all my lovely followers...Saludos from Paraguay!  I can't believe how fast time is flying...I'm not sure what happens to the weeks but I feel like every time I stop to take a breath its already Friday again!  It seems as if I'm living perma-weekend ...which I am definitely not complaining about.  I think I've developed a pretty good balance of work and play and here are some of the things I've been up to recently...

Work

• I finally got my primary project up and running!  After I completed my community census, I held a town meeting to present my findings.  We talked about the major health problems in the community (diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, dental problems, parasites, and colds/flus) and their causes (diet, lack of exercise, and personal hygiene).  Then we did a "lluvia de ideas" aka Brainstorming to come up with project ideas.  After we had our list we took a vote to determine which project to start with.  We decided on a latrine project.  We set a date for our first meeting, and I went home and did my research on latrines.  I was really excited about my findings...I wanted to do a latrine project using recycled materials for the construction.  I figured out how to do the construction, printed out photos, made a super lindo poster and everything only for both ideas to be stomped on.  We want modern bathrooms, and we want to use bricks.  I was super frustrated/angry for several reasons.  1) because I was really excited about my project idea...combating 2 HUGE problems (trash and parasites) with 1 project. and 2) modern bathrooms are MUCH more expensive which means the project just got infinitely harder for various reasons, but in the end its a project for the community members and they need to be excited and invested in the project in order for it to be able to work so I said ok, fine.  We formed our commission, elected a Presidenta, Vice Presidenta, Secretary, and Treasurer.  We have 26 members...and finalized our list in the last meeting.  I went to town with the Presidenta to start looking at prices.  We went to 2 ferriterias to come up with a budget.  Right now we're looking at a little over 4,000,000 Gs per bathroom (which is about $1,000).  I got together with our Secretary and we wrote the official "Acta" needed to receive recognition from the Mayor and the Governor.  I have a photocopy of everyone's ID, and we need to write a solicitude as well this weekend and then we will be ready to turn everything in to hopefully receive recognition.  Once we receive recognition from the Mayor and the Governor we can start asking for funding. 
• I've been giving health charlas in the waiting room of the hospital in town every Wednesday.  So far I have done 2 dental health charlas and a breast feeding charla.  Lyn, the volunteer coordinator in San Ignacio, and Danielle, another volunteer, usually do the charlas with me, but they left me all alone for the breast feeding charla...gee thanks, guys haha.
• I'm still working with the health team at my puesto on Tuesdays.
• I'm still meeting with the Health Commission.  We have meetings every two weeks or so.  So far we've raised funds to buy chairs for the waiting room, and put curtains up on all the windows.  We sold hot dogs and pineapple juice last week for a small fundraiser.  I believe we're working for ceiling fans for the puesto next.
• I still have my English class...although I think I'm going to end it shortly.  We played Twister the other day which they enjoyed...I think.
• I have my girls group...which is really just my 2 girls...aka my best friends in the community. We have a new project idea though.  We're going to start raising money to buy trash cans for the community.  We're planning on making and selling goodies...aka banana bread...and also possibly making bracelets and wallets and stuff from plastic bags and milk/wine cartons to sell as well
• And there are other project plans in the works, that I've previously talked about, but still haven't been implemented...

Life Outside of Work

• I got together with a group of other volunteers from my G to go to the district of Paraguari to this wonderful Eco Reserve called Mbavoti.  It was soooo much fun!  First, we crossed 3 hanging bridges, then we went ziplining, then we repelled; however, my Spanish repelling vocabulary/my knowledge of how to repel isn't quite up to par and I kind of just fell from the cliff and hung from my rope saying "No se que hacer!"  I don't know what to do! So they just lowered me down to the ground haha.
• I went to the Casino in San Ignacio with a group of friends for Karaoke night a couple weeks ago.  We had dinner...the Casino here has super rico food, and then we started singing.  I was super bummed to see that you just sang from your seat.  This does not draw nearly enough attention.  My friend Lyn and I started out with Christina Aguilera's "Genie in a Bottle" to get warmed up.  Next, I showed Cavanaugh love and I, not only sang, but danced to Enrique Iglesias "Escape"...in the middle of the casino.  I had a table of men cheering for me.  IT WAS AWESOME.  A few weeks later, I went to pay my electricity bill, and I was super confused when the teller was asking me if I was going to sing for him until I realized he was one of my cheerleaders.  I told him, I need a few more drinks first. haha.
• It was my host brother's from training birthday last weekend, so I went to visit.  I love visiting them.  I walked in the house to my mother exclaiming "Hola Gorda" and immediately serving me a gigantic plate of one of my favorite dishes.  Mmm it's so good to be home.  There were a few of my other G-mates visiting their families, and there is a whole crew of new trainees in the community so that was also very exciting.  It was really strange being the person with the knowledge...especially about language questions!  I brought the flabongos and raced one of the trainees.  Naturally, I won because "Soy la reina!"  My host brother compared me to a snake while doing flabongos...he says my throat widens ridiculously while I'm chugging the beer...haha.  At one point Rafael and I were on a search for wine (story of my life) and we passed a group of drunk Paraguayan men rattling off in Guarani.  I asked Rafael what they were saying and he responds "they say if we have sex I'm going to die because you're bigger than me."  That is when I decided I am never asking for Guarani translations. EVER. AGAIN. haha.

All in All life is GOOD!  Projects are up and running, and I'm feeling more at ease.  But, I'm SUPER PUMPED for my visit to the states in approximately 6 weeks!  I hope everyone is doing well.  Thank goodness I've made Paraguayan friends because I've been feeling abandoned by my friends State-side recently.  Please fix that by sending me your updates!

The Chuchi List

It's been raining and storming hard for the last couple days so I'm not really sure what to do with myself so I decided to write a quick blog entry...a Chuchi list.

Chuchi was one of the first words I learned upon arriving in country.  It basically means really nice, fancy, or expensive...and now that I'm living in a third world country, I can honestly say that America is CHUCHI! But I've decided to compile a list of things you may all think are ordinary, but I consider chuchi...

1) Perforated toilet paper.  Or, having toilet paper in a bathroom at all.  Carrying TP in you purse is a must here.
2) Having your own glass to drink from during mealtimes.  This is especially rare if you are drinking alcohol.  It is the norm to have one glass of beer/wine/whatever that gets passed around to everyone that is drinking...thus making it nearly impossible to get drunk sometimes.
3) A flushing toilet.  I won't even get started on automatic flushing toilets.
4) Hot water showers.  Hot water in general.
5) Real windows...that aren't just holes in the wall.
6) A roof that doesn't leak when it rains
7) Washing machine
8) Drying machine
9) Dishwasher
10) A sink.  I'll tell you that my "sink" consists of a water spicket and a bucket placed on a chair.
11) Tile floors.
12) Carpet.  Chuchi to the max.  I don't think I've seen ANY carpet since arriving in this country.
13) Cupboards
14) Gyms.  Especially gyms with bars and bumper plates.  I have yet to find a gym with legit weights and I've searched long and hard.
15) Air conditioning
16) Heating
17) Trash cans.  I'm not kidding, I can never find them.  Here people just throw trash wherever they please.
18) Trash pick up.  Really people, appreciate that all you have to do is stick your trash in a bucket outside and it literally disappears from your site.  Most people here that don't throw it, burn it.  My non-compostable trash, I carry in my backpack to my pueblo where there is trash pick up. Yeah I just said I carry my trash in my backpack.
19) Having a car
20) Having gas in your car
21) Boneless, skinless chicken breast
22) Having a choice of which part of the cow you're getting.  Here you get..."meat without bone, more bone than meat, or ribs."
23) Ice cube trays.  Here you fill a plastic bag with water and stick it in the freezer to end up with a chunk of ice resembling a fat dildo.
24) Closets.  I have yet to see a legit closet since arriving in country.  There are "romperos" which are just armoirs (sp?).  A wooden box where you can hang some clothes (if you can find hangers) and a few drawers.
25) Dog food.  Dogs get table scraps here...if they get anything at all.  Bailey gets dog food, and everyone looks at me strange every time I carry it home from my pueblo.
26) Corsages...those silly things couples pin on themselves for prom.  I never even thought about it until I was watching an American movie with some Paraguayans the other day.  They all asked me why we wear those, and I said, actually, I have no idea.  And they all responded with "hmmm...primer mundo (first world)..."  as they shook their heads and laughed.

And I'm sure I'll think of more once I publish this post, but I'm going to go take my grandote overly aggressive dog to workout in the flooded soccer field, shower, and get ready for some karaoke at the CASINO....talk about chuchi!

The 6 month slump

I’m just going to preface this blog entry with this statement: It is getting harder and harder to coherently speak/write in English.  If I lived in a perfect world everyone would be able to understand my joparish (I made that word up) of English, Spanish, and michimi Guarani.  I apologize in advance for my raging grammatical errors, use of incorrect words, and run on sentences.

I had my PTIP (I’m not sure what that stands for either) interview a few Fridays ago with my APCD (aka my boss…we have an acronym for just about everything in PC) in Asuncion followed by another week of training.  I had the weekend free in Asuncion before training started so I decided to travel out to a town called Aregua to visit the “Strawberry Festival.”  The Festival was really neat…it was lacking an actual Festival feel hence my quotation marks, but there were a bunch of vendors selling their delicious strawberry products.  There were strawberry empanadas, strawberry ice cream, strawberries and cream, strawberry juice, strawberry liquor, strawberry cakes, strawberry jam, etc.  All the vendors were set up right in front of all the strawberry fields, so we were able to take a walk to see all the crops as well.  Sunday afternoon a group of us bused out to CAFASA, the resort where training was to be held.  To be perfectly honest, I have no idea what was covered at training because I slept through almost all of it.  Now, before you go and start judging me for being a slacker, let me explain.  I was on my death bed…at least I felt like it.  I had a really high fever for 4 days before I was finally able to get back to Asuncion to visit Medical Mary.  I had a pretty nasty throat infection that completely wiped me out for the week.  On the upside, I had no appetite for about 5 days, and now my jeans aren’t AS tight.

I returned home the following Friday night to face four days of rain (aka not leaving the house because Paraguayans think you’ll melt or something if you’re outside in the rain) and a pretty intense bout of depression/feeling of what the hell am I doing here/with my life?  I tried to come into Peace Corps with as little expectations as possible, but it’s really hard to enter into anything with absolutely no expectations…and I expected a more defined job description/role in my community.  Instead, I feel more like I was dropped into this community with a bunch of strangers I can’t even understand a majority of the time, who spend most of their time laughing at me and gossiping about me.  I was told to find my own co-workers, assess the needs of the community, and design my own projects.  This sounds slightly overwhelming in English, yet alone in not 1, but 2 foreign languages.  Not to mention the fact that I have to ask my friends and neighbors how to do just about EVERYTHING.  My favorite was when I had to call my pesado neighbor who was just begging to come over and sleep with me to help me get my power back on when I shorted the electricity trying to take a luke warm shower.  I was sopping wet in my towel.  Awkward.  Don’t worry; I was fully clothed before he arrived.  But, how do I get to town?  Where do I buy groceries?  How do I get this burrowing parasite (pique) out of my foot?  What are all these black things?  Oh, mouse poop, awesome.  How do I get these maggots out of my dog’s wound?  Why on Earth does my dog have maggots in her wound?  I’d like to make some mbeju (a typical Paraguayan food), what do I need, and how do I do it? How do I say this?  What is that?  What? Que?  Mba’e? I don’t understand.  It’s a very strange feeling, needing so much guidance in some ways, but at the same time having so much more knowledge than these people.  The language barrier is frustrating for several reasons.  Don’t get me wrong I can communicate a HECK OF A LOT BETTER now than when I first arrived, but I still can’t, and I will never be able to speak like I can in English.  Needless to say I was feeling useless and dumb; however, instead of drowning in my misery I made an appointment to speak with one of our head honchos in Asuncion, Dee.  The meeting went awesome.  Apparently most volunteers experience my exact sentiments around month 6…just about where I am now…so I’m right on track with the emotional ride of a PCV.  But she gave me some great advice, she told me some stories from her Peace Corps experience in Burkina Faso, Africa, and it was just a really great conversation in general.  Since arriving back in site, otra vez, I’m feeling on top of the world again.  The term emotional roller coaster, as cliché and overused as it may be, really applies to a Peace Corps Volunteer.  I’m not even kidding when I say it is not uncommon for me to feel every emotion possible throughout the course of one day.  Sometimes I feel like I’m bipolar here.  I went from hating life, spending my days on the verge of tears, wondering what the heck I’m doing here, and being ready to hop on a plane and return to my life in the states on a Monday to feeling very content with life on Wednesday to loving life and feeling on top of the world on Friday.  Besides, I can’t leave now…I have too many pairs of underwear that haven’t fallen out of my pants while playing soccer, there are more Guarani sexual references to be made during lunchtimes (I like them large penises…and you know that large penis from the other day…yeah well, it impregnated me), there is more chisme to be heard about myself, there are more bulls waiting to charge me, there are 19 more months of “I love yous” from strange and maybe not so strange men, and there are approximately 570 days left of operation make a fool of myself every day.  Living life SIN VERGUENZA; the only way.

                I live in a really small community which translates to BIG CHISME.  I try to stay out of the chisme realm because I know la gente are saying all kinds of things about me (and everybody else), and honestly it hurts my feelings to hear some of the things they have to say; however, some of the chisme gets to me.  I thought I’d share my two favorite bits of chisme:

1)      Me and Bailey are having sex.  Not only do I practice bestiality, but I’m also a lesbian now too.

2)      I’m dating one of the town drunks.  Apparently, I like boys again.

Trabajo

• Mondays:  I’ve designated Monday as my charla day in the escuela.  Last Monday I did a hand washing charla complete with a song and dance.  And I’m planning on doing a series of parasite charlas in the upcoming weeks.  Monday afternoons I have a girls group.  I currently only have 3 girls, but they are my favorites.  They’re my best friends in the community, nevermind the fact that they are 14-16. I plan to work on self esteem, values and decisions making, and life planning with the girls…eventually…but this upcoming Monday we’re making banana bread.
• Tuesday is my puesto day where I hang out at our health post.  We usually have a Health Commission meeting at some point on Tuesdays as well.  I’m so proud of the group!  By this coming Tuesday we will have chairs in the waiting room, and curtains on all the windows!  Tuesday afternoons I have my English class.
• Wednesday I go to San Ignacio and I work in the district hospital with an important lady.  I’m not exactly sure of her role in the hospital still, but I know she’s important because she shares an office with the Directora of the hospital.  We’re working on developing a curriculum to train youth to become youth educators on the following themes: HIV/AIDS, STI’s, Addiction (alcohol, marijuana, and crack), Moto safety, and environmental education-mainly combating trash.
• Thursdays: I’ve designated the morning to hang out in the colegio…one day I will start giving charlas in the colegio, but I’m not going to lie…the high school students intimidate me, and I’m not ready yet.  Thursday afternoons I have my English class.
• Fridays are my world map day.  I’ve recently acquired paint and paint brushes to start drawing/painting a world map on one of the walls in the school.
• I have 2 more census to complete…SO CLOSE to being done.  The census has been interesting.  I have found people who don’t have floors in their latrines (hello parasites), some people have no latrines…I couldn’t bring myself to ask them where they used the bathroom, and many people when asked how they disposed of their trash plainly stated, sin verguenza, oh we just throw it.  Oiii vey.  Anyway, I’m planning on holding a community meeting one afternoon this week so we can start improving latrines and start building fogones.
• Youth Taller: I’m working with my closest volunteer neighbor, Danielle, to plan a youth taller this summer.   We’d like for a majority of the volunteers in Misiones to bring 2-3 youth from their community. We’re planning for the first weekend in February and we’re going to spend a weekend with the youth going over topics such as HIV/AIDS, values and decision making, and a career/college/scholarship fair.  I’ve submitted an application for a Grant to help fund the project, and Danielle’s talked to our Gobernador who is definitely willing to help fund the conference as well.
• Summer Education: I’m also working with other volunteers in Misiones and Itapúa (a department next door to me) to develop a summer curriculum.  We’re meeting in a couple of weeks to share our ideas and finalize the curriculum.  We’d like to work with the elementary school kids during the summer to help improve literacy rates (they’re atrocious).

And one last story for good measure.  So yesterday I was so freaking hot and frustrated.  My house is being taken over by ants…and other insects.  You name it, I have it: ants, centipedes, spiders, worms, flies, mosquitoes, frogs, toads—hello Summer!  I seriously have swept out millions of dead ants from my house…and they’re dead because I’m poising them (and most likely myself and Bailey) with this ant killing powder.  I finally bought a fan yesterday only for it to fall over on the bus and not work when I got home.  The men here are driving me nuts.  They are so pesado, frustrating, manipulative, and machista.  Anyway, so yesterday was rough, but I went over to my neighbor’s house to visit…and my already favorite senora secured her place as my favorite yesterday by making dirty jokes and teaching me Guarani insults.  She told me next time a man tries to come sleep with me tell him “Ándate ejapiro tuna” go jerk off on a cactus….yessssss.

And that’s all she wrote, folks.  Love and miss you all!  Please send me updates, per usual, most of you are slacking in that department.

Rohayhu

Rohayhu…I’ve been hearing that a lot lately.  It means “I love you” in Guarani, and men tell me all the time to which I respond “Nde Japu”…you lie...

So I’m all moved in to my new house…it’s been a while now, but I absolutely love it!  I have a kitchen, a living room, a bedroom, and a bathroom, and sometimes I have cows.  My “dresser” is made from two wooden planks, 2 cardboard boxes, and 1 chair.  I'm still trying to save up for a refrigerator and a fan because its starting to get HOT!  And would you like to know my address?  I finally figured it out today when my neighbor brought over my electricity bill (the equivalent of $1.67) “San Juan Potrero 666.  Barrio San Roque cerca de Simplicio B---.”  Literally, I’m living in the devil’s house in the neighborhood of San Roque next to Simplicio B---.  Only in Paraguay does your address state your neighbor’s name.  I love it.

Let’s see I’ve been semi busy recently.  In July we had a week of language training and HIV/AIDS information in Asuncion.  I was able to stay with my training host family for a few days which was SO AWESOME.  I absolutely love that family.  I walked into open arms, “wow, you got fat!” “What happened to your face?  Did you crash?” and “Did you get yourself pregnant in the campo?” comments.  It’s very nice to see you all too.  Haha.  It is true; I’m becoming uglier every day since arriving in Paraguay.  My face is so broken out I should be on a pro-active commercial, I just keep getting fatter (my jeans are literally ripping...so I've just resorted to wearing yoga pants everyday), and my hair…well it’s just a wild mess of disaster.  I’ve gotten better at enduring the comments and no longer almost burst into tears when people make these comments to me because I know that (most) Paraguayans mean no harm, it’s just what they do.  I just have to keep telling myself I’m getting prettier on the inside.  But in all seriousness, I really do love my host family from training.  I honestly felt home when I walked into the house, I can tell that they do really love me and care about me, and it was so nice to be able to have real conversations now that I can communicate more effectively than a 2 year old.

I went down south in the city of Encarnacion to visit my friend Stacy from training one weekend.  Encarnacion is an awesome city.  It’s so far south you can see Argentina across the river.  My favorite part of Encarnacion was Super 6…I thought I died and went to heaven.  It was a supermarket that had more than 3 bite sized aisles, a FULL produce section, peanut butter, BOTTLES (not just boxes) of wine, other alcohol, a freezer section, cheese (that was not Queso Paraguayo and did not smell like dirty feet), an aisle of pet supplies, and my favorite part? BONELESS, SKINLESS chicken breast!  I’m not even kidding when I squealed and jumped around like I’d just won a million dollars when I saw that.

Last weekend I went to an 80 year old man’s birthday party in my community, and it was so much fun.  When I first got there I felt super awkward and lame because I didn’t really know anyone and everyone was just sitting around speaking in Guarani; however, after dinner I decided to start drinking the wine that was just sitting on the table waiting to be drank…and then the fun began.  One of the town drunks was sitting across from me and I successfully managed to switch out his wine and coke for just plain coke which everyone thought was pretty funny.  He asked me what my name was to which I replied “Princessa pora” which translates to pretty princess.  Then he said he was hungry so I served him a plate of lettuce and he told me “Rohayhu.”  Then I made friends with this Bolivian girl and we started the dance party.  The 80 year old birthday man kept introducing me to his friends because being single in Paraguay is not acceptable!  I danced with a few old men and ended up getting home at about 2am!

As far as work goes…

• I started teaching an English class.  Tuesdays and Thursdays at the high school.  I really have no idea what I’m doing or how to be a teacher.  I originally had over 50 students-which was super overwhelming, but it’s slowly starting to dwindle (thank goodness).  I actually kicked a kid out of class during a quiz and gave him a zero.  I think I take after my momma bear in the classroom.
• I’m working with a community commission to build a community garden.  So far we’ve only been clearing away the weeds and prepping the space.  Apparently we still need seeds and everything so we have a long way to go still.
• I have the health commission up and running again.  We’ve been meeting weekly, and we’re in the middle of some fundraisers.  The meetings are always conducted in Guarani which means I understand close to nothing and usually just escape to Casey Land…so I really can’t tell you what we’re planning, but the health post needs a lot of things…aka chairs in the waiting room.
• I still haven’t finished my community census. Blah.
• Another volunteer and I are planning a Youth Leadership Conference.  We’re planning on collaborating with the other volunteers in our area.  We’ll each bring 2-3 youth from our communities and we’re going to touch on subjects such as values and decision making, HIV/AIDS education, and we’d like to do a career/college fair complete with information about scholarship opportunities.  We sent in our grant application the other day so hopefully that gets approved.

All in all things are going well!  Bailey is doing really well too.  She’s had a couple of wounds, one of which was complete with maggots, and I’m not sure how she got them.  She has her dog friends in the community that she goes and plays with everyday…she spends more time at the neighbors’ houses than mine, but she constantly checks up on me, and she likes to torment the chancitos and vacitas next door.

I miss you all mucho, and I hope everything is going well with everyone!